Saturday, September 20, 2008

where are you going

I find myself once again floating around aimlessly swiping my hands around in a desperate need to latch onto something-anything. I am surrounded by an infinite amount of potential life spans but i feel extremely lost. I don't know what to do next with myself, and as when i was a child i feel the angst of making the wrong move. I thought this feeling would evaporate as i got older but it's still here. After i complete one stage or challenge or task or role or mission or project or...anything i feel this overwhelming need to move on and try something different. Yet i freeze and i can't proceed, i reach a point of existential blockage.

I know that I've evolved as a human being, I'm wiser and more in tune with my physical body's reaction to the physical world around me. My character is defined to me...so in other words i know how my being function in a way i could never imagine 10 years ago. For that, I'm thrilled.

but i feel so stuck right now.

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